slunk

i need sleep.

after a week of stress-filled tapeworms for my dog, preparing for davis trip, long late nights, early morning, work days, gift preparing, goodbye dinners, sweet moments with nostalgic friends, barbecues, card-making, photo-taking, dressing up, long bittersweet talks, heavy hearts, to moments full of laughter, cankersores, I think it’s time to get some rest after tomorrow’s set and flying down for a wedding and driving my mom to the airport early in the wee dawn… I will forever disappear in my cave.

Beethoven

“Beethoven, on the advice of his doctor, lived in the small Austrian town of Heiligenstadt, just outside Vienna, from April to October 1802 in an attempt to come to terms with his condition. There he wrote his Heiligenstadt Testament, a letter to his brothers which records his thoughts of suicide due to his growing deafness and records his resolution to continue living for and through his art.^[49] Over time, his hearing loss became profound: there is a well-attested story that, at the end of the premiere of his Ninth Symphony, he had to be turned around to see the tumultuous applause of the audience; hearing nothing, he wept.^[50] Beethoven’s hearing loss did not prevent his composing music, but it made playing at concerts—a lucrative source of income—increasingly difficult. After a failed attempt in 1811 to perform his own Piano Concerto No. 5 (the “Emperor”), which was premiered by his student Carl Czerny, he never performed in public again.”

-wiki

 

One of the most tragic artistic geniuses.. To create heaven to realize you can never enter… To create masterpieces only to find you are not allowed in the gallery. Thank you Beethoven for your intense musical masterpieces though you were never able to hear, the world thanks you!

shin bowl noodle soup

I am currently scarfing down a delicious (so delicious) bowl of Shin Ramen at my desk. IT is  SO DELICIOUS. Salty, jja, spicy hot, and full of all the absence of nutrients and cancer-causing agents a person could wish for their lunch. Now I know, from the 99.99% likelihood of past experiences that I will regret eating this. The bloating will kick in, the jja MSG will start sweeping through my blood streams and cause me to be lethargic and my booty to get just a teensy bit bigger. And each noodle consumed will start strangling each artery. HOWEVER, i still eat it. I still crave it. It’s all a matter of choice of whether I choose to eat it. 

Ramen= sin. So good in the moment, so bad forevermore after. And it makes you keep coming back to that pathway of regret and shame and guilt. 

Milk= cleansing power of Jesus. It is white. It is good for your bones. It counterbalances the swelling of the face, lets your bowel movements move. 

We need more milk. New revelation for today.

Got milk? Or should I say, God Milk?

Love

whatshouldwecallme:

For some people:

For me:

psalm 23